HELP PLEASE!

If you live in the East Valley and have an OB that you LOVE, please leave his/her name or info here. My OB who delivered Jaxon retired, and I was not really impressed with the other guy I transferred to in the same office.
I am not pregnant, on the contrary, I need to start seeing an OB to figure out exactly why I am NOT getting pregnant, and would love someone:
1. close to my house,
2. delivers at Banner Gateway (the one on Higley and the Freeway)
3. a women.

BUT!!! If you absolutely love your OB, I will forgo some of that wishlist for someone I really get a good feeling from....especially since we are entering a new and sensitive phase here...

Motherhood: The adventures continue...

This is how we found Jaxon when we went in to check on him last night!

I just got a double MOTY (Mother of the Year)

...and not in a good way. After that last positive and uplifting motherhood post, this one is bringing my soaring spirits right DOWN. Sometimes, without even knowing he is doing it, Jaxon really puts me in my place. Examples 1 AND 2...
1. We don't say "Stupid" at our house....except... sometimes I forget and say it while talking on the phone. I slipped twice in one day last week and Jaxon proceeded to start calling everything and everyone stupid. That in itself made me feel bad enough, becuase it was obviously my example that set him off. Well, I kept explaining that I was sorry, and how I forgot and we DON'T SAY STUPID. When Dave got home, Jaxon called something stupid, and Dave really gave it to him...Jaxon then said,
"Well, Mom says stupid, and if she says stupid, then I can say stupid, because THAT'S FAIR! I get to say stupid when Mommy says stupid, and she said stupid A LOT OF TIMES TODAY!" (please note that he used the actual word stupid as many times as possible just to get his point across...) Seriously...why does he hear nothing I want him to, and everything I don't want him to?

..............................................ENTER EXAMPLE #2...100 times worse in my opinion.......................

2. I have talked about the format of my exercise class before. Every 3 months we get a video with new moves and music to memorize and we have a two week "party" at the gym where we play only that and have prizes and dress up etc... Well, in our new release that I have been working on memorizing, the song I Kissed A Girl by Katie Perry is on there. I really hate that song. Mostly because it is so dang catchy and I wish it had different words because I love the actual tune, and even hating the song, if I hear the slightest snippet, it's stuck in my head ALL DAY and I find myself singing it...ARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGG!!!

I thought I had been very careful about never listening to that song while going over my music in the car and not practicing that song with Jaxon around. Obviously I have failed miserably. Tonight right after family prayer, Jaxon says to Dave,

"Mom kisses girls at the gym." Just so matter of factly and out of the blue.

Dave said, "Uh....what?"

Jaxon: "MOM KISSES GIRLS AT THE GYM!!!!"

(ME intervening because I knew exactly where this was coming from and trying to avoid it...)

"Jaxon, I only Kiss you and Daddy, and you are both boys!"

Jaxon: "Well how come your gym song says you like to kiss girls and then you go practice with girls at the gym then???" (With a serious attitude as if he was certainly going to prove me wrong...)

So, I told a big whopper of a lie to try to rectify this horrifying situation...

Me: "Jaxon- A boy sings that song. Boys can kiss girls if they are in love and married so that is what he is talking about."

Jaxon: "okay..." (As if he knew there was something he was missing in that arguement but couldn't quite figure out what it was...)

Somedays are just better...or worse...than others.

Forgive me a minute...

...while I wax sentimental, and perhaps a bit religious. Even though I am a "Stay at home mom"...for the last several months I been essentially working 3 part time jobs...building 2 businesses and teaching at the gym...I love all of it, but it is so time consuming. I have been suffering mass amounts of guilt about the amount of time and attention Jaxon has been getting (not getting) from me. "Guilt" is not exactly the right word though...just an extremely urgent and pressing feeling that it is absolutely imperative that our time together become much more often and meaningful. As in, I really REALLY feel like I have been prompted over and over again by the spirit, that it is VERY necessary for me to re-prioritize RIGHT NOW!

We are together ALL DAY, but it wasn't, for the most part, quality time. For the last week I have made a conscious effort to put Jaxon first and really prioritize. Everyday we spent at least an hour, together on the ground playing dinosaurs, motorcycles, blocks, whatever his heart desires. (FOR THE RECORD- I am in NO WAY trying to say what a good mom I am...on the contrary, I am admitting how bad I feel that I had been doing for quite some time...)

So, I have had a very real and tangible change take over my feelings, emotions, and body. Everything has finally (for the first time in several months) seemed like it is just right...and as a side note, everything I need to do is still getting done. I don't have that forboding feeling hanging over me anymore, it is such a genuine weight off my shoulders, and I think much more clearly. I promise I am not trying to sound preachy, just trying to express what a markedly different feel there is inside my body.

For Jaxon's part, he has never been more responsive, less aggressive, more loving, respectful, responsible, and such a good listener...ever. I know that we will have our ups and downs, but I am so happy about my newfound "place in the home." Who knew a little change could bring about such massive results? Oh yes, Heavenly Father...hence all the counsel on the role of mothers. Amen. :o)

Arizona Museum of Natural History

That's where Jax and I went today with some fun friends. We took a little detour on the way though...we went to downtown Mesa Via Downtown phoenix...woops...little miscomunication as to where exactly this museum was. Jaxon may have been more frustrated but he had his good buddy Brailyn and lots of snacks to keep him company. I think the museum was pretty cool...but dinosaur bones are a little over Jaxon's head...as in...he doesn't really get how that large skeletal thing is in any way or ever was a dinosaur...thus...he had little interest. He loved looked at the real-looking models, and some of the other interactive exhibits though. All in all, a fun time out of the house, without having to endure the heat!

Jaxon, Brailyn and Parker


I don't know why I love this picture so much...but I do. Maybe the way he's back lit and looks so big...


Jaxon's best dinosaur face...

Yup- never a smile for the camera... at least he's consistant!

I came, I saw, I pledged my heart out!

Good news- I did not botch the pledge and it went really well this morning!
Bad news- Senator McCain was not there yet. boo...

I actually had a dream last night where I met him after the pledge and we started talking and he let me do a photoshoot of his family. The white house photographer(apparently he was president in my dream) came too and gave me all sorts of great pointers. It was awesome.

I really enjoyed hearing him speak. He didn't mince any words or try to tread lightly on any touchy subjects like abortion and the healthcare plan. It was refreshing. It also got me really pumped to be more involved. He said people really need to be writing letters and getting involved in town hall meetings, that it really does make a difference!

I think I've got it...

I am very humbled and honored to be here. I love our Country and the freedoms that have been earned by the sacrifices of people like Senator McCain.

What do you think? Short, from the heart, and non-controversial...