What to say?

Well, tonight was my video, or should I say, my first video attempt. Let's start with the positives (I'm going to toot my own horn for a moment...keep reading to see why I need a good build up). My choreography was great, my cues were right on, and I think I added some fun personality to the class. Every single thing that I was worried could possibly go wrong (and that Dave gave me a blessing covering) went perfectly, honestly-the best it possibly could have! I had 32 people in the class, which I am almost certain is a gym record for the water!!! (THANK YOU THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO CAME!!!) Now, for the part that I have cried about several times tonight...during the hardest song (track 6- cardio kickboxing) I was doing jumping kicks (this is NOT a granny class--Im telling you!!) Anyway, I came down on the side of my foot, and my options were 1. Sprain my ankle, or 2. Fall down so as not to put that much weight on the side of my foot. I chose option 2, and I was down for 4 beats. I jumped back up and didn't miss a move, I got right into what we were doing, make a quick joke to the class, and kept going. I didn't cry, I didn't get frazzled, I didn't lose where I was in the music, and I kept smiling. In my mind I kept thinking, "HEY! This is real life! I am teaching on a pool deck that has a huge crack down the middle, the surface is uneven, and IT IS WET from splashed water! Everybody falls...its what you do after that fall that counts!" So I kept going becuase what else was I going to do with 32 people in the pool? And I didn't just plod on...I had fun, I did it right, and I accomplished my goals. Well, after class I talked to the manager who was taping, and she said she didn't think we could send the tape in. Needless-to-say, I was, and am crushed. I know it's not THAT big of deal, and I can tape again next week, but it really sucks that I worried, and practiced, and lost sleep over all the things I needed to do right, and I did them ALL, and it's still not good enough. The manager that taped me is fairly new, and is going to review the tape with the other manager. If they say "We aren't sending it in", then I'm retaping next week. If they say, "It's up to you," I am still not sending it in. If they say, "We think you should still send it in", then obviously I will, but I'm not holding my breath. Alas, everything happens for a reason, so what is the reason for this?

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It is now an hour after I wrote the above section and I have been laying in bed unable to sleep. And I think it has come to me- It happened because, "It's what you do after the fall that counts." That's just it. I won't "go all gospel," but that is the lesson I am going to take from this. Now I ask myself the question, why did I need to learn this lesson right now? What is happening, or going to happen, that I will need this lesson for? Yikes...I'll keep you posted...
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13 comments:

CJB said...

Aw Ash I am so sorry that your one little fall will cause you to re-do it. I too thought you handled it smashingly. No flustering, you assured us you were ok and kept going. Perhaps if you re-do next week, it'll be even better? Like without Santa continually yelling out we should go get ice-cream?

Brandis said...

Oh, Ashley. I don't even know what to say. That must have been really disappointing. Sorry!!

Marie said...

I think you did such a wonderful job. I also think you looked really good in your fancy workout clothes! I am totally amazed that you were able to maintain your composure after falling. I'm pretty sure I would not have been able to hold it together. You are amazing in so many ways. Thank you for being so inspiring to me.

Colburns said...

I am really suprised they let you jump up and down on the deck! La doesn't because it is such a huge liability issue. How do I know that? I was jumping and the manager flipped her lid! I am glad you had such a great turn out. Look at you the evolution of teaching classes is passes right through this ward!

Lauryn said...

awww I am sorry to hear that Ashley - but... it does mean that if you re-tape - I can be there this time! :)

Lauryn said...

PS: I am back on blogger with my blog... update your link to:

http://laurynvanrooy.blogspot.com :)

Elise said...

You're awesome and no matter what, you're going to grow from this experience. I SO wish I could come to one of your classes, although a "granny" class might be a little better for me...

I'll be thinking of you!

Momma Malia said...

i know why you're supposed to do it again!! so i can come to the taping. duh!! don't worry, you'll be more at east now, and it will be magnifique!!

AnnaMarie said...

Sorry, Ashley. I'm sure you'll do it perfectly next time (if you have to do it again), but I know it'd be nice to have the pressure off!

Courtney said...

That is really too bad that happened... but I'm with Malia! Let me know IF and when you need to re tape, I'd love to go! :)

THE TAASE'S said...

Yikes...sorry to hear about the fall Ash..BUT, I believe you have the right spirit about it. IT IS about what you DID after the incident, and now you've learned and grown from it right? I really hope you said yes to that question, otherwise you can just curse my name under your breath:P Why am I so dumb and thought that you too were in the pool during the class?

Flaherty Fam said...

I had so much fun at your class and think you did a fabulous job. If it was me teaching on a slippery deck I would be falling all the time. For anyone who has made assumptions of what water areobics is, needs to take your class. I think I was actually sweating in the pool...is that possible? Anyways, you did fantastic and I know everything will work out.

Layne and Kelly Nelson said...

I'm so proud of you Ashley, and I know exactly how you feel. Without going into detail, I've been in a similar situation where I couldn't have been more prepared, and felt cheated when it didn't go the way I had planned. Suffice it to say that I've learned that inspite of how insignificant these kind of things may seem in the big picture, they often do happen for a reason, and we're more often than not better for it. Way to get right back on the horse and not give up! Better a little hurt pride than a busted ankle!