A few rules to live by...in China

#1- always carry tissue! The Chinese in general to not believe in using western toilets (and when they have no choice- they will stand ON THE SEAT and squat from there!!!), nor do they believe in using toilet paper--BE PREPARED!

#2- Do not hold said tissue in your hand while zipping/unzipping your zipper. I did this and got tissue stuck. No amount of pulling, pushing, jumping up and down or heaving by me or my 3 sisters made any progress. ENTER- SAINTLY PIZZA HUT WORKER. She quickly saw my dilemma when I was standing in the bathroom with my zipper down and 3 different people trying to help me pull it up. She quickly jumped in the mix and yanked, tried picking it out with her extra long pinky finger nail (don't ask me why they grow it that way...I don't get it either!), and dripped some water from the sink into my pants. When that didn't work she motioned for me to wait just a minute (as if I was going to go anywhere at that point) and she came back with a toothpick. She finally picked the toilet paper out and zipped my zipper up all by herself ( I think she would have buttoned my pants too if I would have let her..) and she was the first person I bowed to in China! I was saying "Thank you! Thank you!" over and over again!

3. DO NOT sit in the first row at the Grand Chinese Acrobatics show! While we were at the show, (more to come on this because dispite the story I am about to tell, it was UNBELIEVABLE!) During the show, one of the acrobats standing on the seat of her bicycle (while it was moving of course) lost control and her bike flew into the first row of seats- totally clobbering a little kid! We were in the 3rd row, and quickly realized, THOSE were the best seats in the house!

4. DO NOT talk to anyone in the market unless you are prepared to stop. They will grab your arm, shirt, neck...Heck, I think my hair was grabbed at home point. All while screaming (not a joke- SCREAMING) in your face "HEY LADY! I GIVE YOU BEST DEAL! YOU FIRST SALE OF DAY! DAT IS GOOD LUCK! WHAT YOU WANT? NAME YOUR PRICE!" My dad had to pry a few fingers off of me and steer me away while fending off grabbing hands.



We are having a great time, and are sad to see our time coming to an end. I am really excited to see my boys again though!

5 comments:

Brit said...

wow I cant wait for the stories in person!

Sarah said...

Wow, those are some great rules to live by.
And some awesome stories to share.
Hope you keep having tons of fun.

Trish said...

Wow funny stories! Did you guys hear about grandma? I know everyone was trying to get a hold of your dad...

Terolleeq said...

And Paula likes to go shopping? That sure sounds like a lot of fun. Party on!!!!

Valerie: said...

glad your having a great time. When do you return to "real life"? Where is play group now and are we still having it on friday since you are gone?