Family Vacation day 2- Saturday

I am bound and determined to blog this darn vacation!

Saturday we got up, and went swimming with Peyton and Hailey (and uncle Ryan) at the motel swimming pool...quite chilly so it didn't last long.  Jaxon kept Uncle Ryan entertained with all his "dives" which are actually the most amazing belly flops you've ever seen in your life.  His feet and legs come way back over his head, but it doesn't seem to hurt J, and he loves the splash.

  Then we went with the ENTIRE clan, 28, up to BYU to eat at BYU at the Cougar Eat. Unfortunately we forgot that only Subway, Scoreboard Grill, and Taco Bell are open on Saturdays...but who doesn't love Taco Bell...right??
  We then went bowling (with Bumpers) and everyone had a great time. The highlight was when all the adults had a basketball shooting contest in the arcade style basketball shoot out. I am proud to say that out of 9 contestants, 5 of which were men, I TOOK THIRD!!! WOOT WOOT! Still got it.... HA!

(This is the ONLY picture I got of bowling before my Point and Shoot died!) BOO!

 Afterwards we drove up the canyon and got to Aspen Groves! This place is AMAZING!!!!  We stayed in the nice new dorm style housing "Beckham Lodge" Each room had one or two bedrooms, a bathroom, and a sitting room with a pullout couch.  The best part was that each floor had a huge common area with tons of couches, and tables for playing games.  The kids joined here whenever they weren't busy doing kids group stuff, and the adults met here everynight for Rook, Blockus, Wii, and general good times!

  We got settled in, unpacked (So nice to have dressers so we weren't living out of a suitcase for a week) and headed to dinner.  Not to bad for mass produced food. Always fairly healthy, with a big salad bar, and dessert with dinner.
  That night the adults had orientation while the kids went to their kids group.  Jaxon really lucked out and got THE BEST counselors of the whole place, Sarah, and Jason, Jaxon was TOTALLY SOLD on Jason, whom Jaxon thought was the bees knees since their names were only one letter apart...and because he is so anti-girl at the moment!

 
We were ready to get the party started!

Just wanted to let you know...

I'm happy....Happier than I can remember being....maybe...ever?
I'm content....I have so many blessings, how could I feel short changed?
Life is good...and I am working everyday to find more good.

  We haven't gotten everything we wanted this year, but everything we have is worth living for.  I made a decision to stop waiting to live my life.  I'm not putting my life, dreams, love, pursuits on hold anymore "until ________."  ...Until we get pregnant, until our fertility treatments are over,  until I lose more weight, until the first of the year, until we have more money... etc. etc. etc. etc.

  Along with that, I've decided to be more proactive about the things that are important to me. Planning family outtings, going to the temple, cooking more, cleaning more, spending time with old friends, making new friends, researching fertility, Eastern medicine, and getting to the bottom of what is absolutely the best things to put in our bodies.

 I also decided that I'm just letting "things" go.  I have my own saddness, let downs, short comings, disappointments, etc to deal with, and I'm just not taking on anyone else's. I'm not judging, and it feels good. I realized this year, you just never know what someone is going through or has been through.  When someone else makes bad choices, or choices I don't agree with my, only job is to decide for me, "will I, or won't I make a similar decision?"  that's it. I'm trying not to pass judgement, and as a result, I'm not so harsh with myself either. 

  Over here at The Rogers, we are smiling.  We are grateful for all that we have, and focused on it. 
I read this quote yesterday that sums up how we are trying to live, and is our new mantra (It is going to go up in the house somewhere...)
" The happiest people on earth don't have the best of everything,  they just make the best of everything they have."

Ferrell Family Vacation Part 1

I am still anti-blogging, and still haven't figured out the reason! But none the less, I will want to remember all this, so HERE WE GO!

Pre-story:  For the second year in a row, Dave was unable to attend the big family reunion. Last year, Rogers in Yellowstone, this year Ferrell's at Aspen Groves.  I'm praying this never happens again. I miss my man, the help, the company, and making family memories that include HIM!

Thursday- The Drive to Provo
  Jaxon and I decided to caravan up with my brother and his girls.  We also invited our two other nieces to switch back and forth between cars for fun and help. 
Side notes- driving makes me bored, which makes me hungry.  Usually Dave drives and I sleep, I'm EXCELLENT at falling asleep for lengthy car rides. So trying to eat healthy, I had a lot of diet caffinated soda, and sun flower seeds to keep me alert. (sounds healthy, right?)

1st leg- Jaxon (4) and Makenna (7) worked out pretty well. Makenna was a big help, and things only got dicey when they disagreed on the DVD selection
2nd- Jaxon (4) and Alyssa (11 going on 19) HEAVEN!  She helped Jaxon, didn't care about watching the DVD, and chatted with me like a girlfriend would! I LOVE THAT GIRL!!!
3rd- Jaxon and Makenna again...going downhill...they were both tired of being in the car, and tired of each other.
4th- Peyton (8) and Makenna (7) This really wouldn't have been too bad if It hadn't been the last leg of the trip. They were good girls acting exactly their age, but I was a little frazzled having driven the whole thing myself, and their laughter and sillyness was a little loud.  I should probably apologize for being cranky...but they should probably apologize for hitting the DVD player repeatedly! (oh wait, they did!)

We got Checked into the Super 8 right across from BYU and hit the sack.  Not the nicest hotel, but for 28 of us for the nights before Aspen Groves, it was fine. If it were anywhere else in the nation I may have feared for my safety...but good old Provo...NAH!

FRIDAY
  I got together with a bestie from yonderyear, Lindsay, and couldn't have enjoyed more, our time sitting outside the creamery while our sons got sticky eating ice cream, and dirty launching dirt clods!
  All the fam started rolling in, and it was wonderful, loud, overwhelming, and wonderful to have all 28 there!
I had a mini- melt down that I think scared everyone as to my mental status for the rest of the trip, but luckily it was the only one.

 Family drama ensued...enough said.

Friday afternoon we all went to 7 peaks. It was a great time.  Everyone watched out for everyone elses little ones, Dad kept the snacks, drinks, and burgers flowing, and even got talked into going down 2 of the scariest slides there.  In his defense, my brothers didn't actually tell him which slide he would be going down. I saw him on the walk back, holding his chest.  He said he renamed the slides. One was called "Nearer My God to Thee" and the other was "Lord I'm Coming Home"  ...at least he had a sense of humor about it!   This was the first activity where everyone got to start getting to know my brother's fiance Erin, and WE LOVE HER! She is wonderful, beautiful, kind and thoughtful, and I can't wait until she is really my sister!

 Friday night more family drama...enough said!  :o)

I think that's the end of days without pictures, so I'll end there for today

Like I said...

That last post was just a teaser.  I am uploading quite a few more karate pictures.....so if you're not related to Jaxon...you just might not care that much. I'm cool with that.
But before you sign out, a couple questions-

1 Does anyone else get A TON of comments on their blog in Chinese/Japanese?  It is starting to weird me out a little! If you check back on my post comments, you will see what I'm talking about! 

2. What are the fall sports for kids? We want to start Jaxon in something else, but don't know what is available.  We know soccer, does anything else run in the fall? Help please!

Finally, Karate pictures! Disclaimer- it's really dark in the gym where he does Karate.  I had my ISO turned ALL THE WAY UP... (as in 6400) to get these shots without too much blur from all his movement...so that is why they are so grainy!)

First- Jaxon LOVES to yell his Ki-ais.  He's the smallest kid in class, but also the loudest!

Next...when he's actually paying attention...his form isn't half bad!

Sometimes though, his "Creative Karate" side kicks in.  One thing he likes to do is "Eyes closed karate" Don't ask me why....

Here they were kicking their hands.  Jaxon is shockingly flexible...but I think I may have mentioned that a time or two....

Here is Jaxon doing "horse Stance" with his best mean guy face... frightening, isn't it?

And Finally, the Jaxon we all know and love.... MR CHEESE!!!

Just a Teaser...

I can't believe that I waited until Jaxon's last day of Karate to take some pictures, but I definately got some good ones. I don't have much time this morning to get them all up, but had to share two of my favorites.

We were very glad to get Jaxon into karate this year, and he loved it, but he didn't seem to pay one lick of attention.  He loved doing his own interpretation and just being a wild man. He made a best little friend named Connor who actually really got it, and it highlighted Jaxon's lack of...well...getting it!  Anyway, he did his belt testing last night, and I thought for sure it was going to be a real disaster.  I was pleasantly surprised! He knew A LOT more than I gave him credit for, and he did really well.  He wasn't scared at all standing by himself in front of Sensai and doing all of his moves. He needed reminding on a few, but he did a great job and was so proud of himself.

Here is Jaxon doing his best "You Wanna Piece of Me Sucka???"  moves and face-

Next I just love this picture of Jaxon looking so small at the testing table and compared to Sensai, but being so strong in his moves.  He is FEARLESS!!!

And the best part of all....Jaxon earned his YELLOW BELT!  We will be gone for the next two weeks of Karate, but will be back in time for the awards and belt ceremony.  My little karate master is growing up!

I miss...

Waking up to this-

Seeing this throughout the day-

Going to bed to this-

That it wasn't to hot for this-

But what I missed the most was this-

so we're back.

Blindsided. Twice.

Here we go again...

For the last 6 weeks we have been prepping (shots, meds, drs apts) for a frozen embryo transfer. We had one average quality embryo frozen, and wanted to use it before we made any other decisions.

Wednesday June 30th, was our transfer, and it didn't go very well.  Most of the embryo's cells had died while thawing.  The dr. said that there was only a slim chance that it would work, but since we had done all the prep and drugs, and since there were still a few living cells, we would go ahead with the transfer. 

We did all the necessary things, bedrest for 3 days, rest for following 9 days.  Friday July 9th I went in for a blood test to see if we were pregnant.  We did not in any way think that we were, so it was just a formality to be sure.  We had planned some other things for the coming months and the rest of the year so that I would have some other things to focus on when the news came in.

 Imagine our surprise when our dr. called Friday afternoon to congratulate us on our pregnancy.  We were exstatic, but very much is shock.

 Blindsided #1.

We went out to dinner to celebrate, and didn't talk much about the baby, because we were still so surprised. We both said that it would be much more real when we heard a heartbeat. 

Today I went in for the first of several more blood tests to track the progress of the baby by tracking the increase of HcG in my blood.  The Dr. called less than 2 hours later to tell us that instead of doubling like it should have, the HcG had gone down. Prognosis- not pregnant anymore.

Blindsided #2.

Obviously we are very sad.  I wish that the news the first time would just have been negative, because we were ready for it with no expectations.  It hurts a lot more now that I had 3 whole days to think that I was going to have a baby. 

We are okay. Jaxon and I already had a trip planned to visit family in California this weekend, so we aren't skipping town just because of this, but it is nice to get away.  Again- comments, emails and texts are welcome, but I probably won't answer the phone much until we get back from Cali next Monday.