1. We have finally worked out a system to keep Jaxon from calling for us at Unearthly-early times in the morning. If he calls for us before his lamp turns on (at 6:05) he has to take a nap that day, instead of quiet time...and it works like a charm. He usually wakes up around 5:45ish, gets up, uses his potty chair in his room, and get's himself dressed and waits for the lamp to turn on.
So the other morning, he called for me when he was not supposed to, and it went something like this- (Imagine 4-year old stream-of-conscious speech that just comes out in one, never-ending sentence!)
"MOM!! MOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM!!! I need you! I know I'm not supposed to call for you and I really tried not to, but this is an EMERGENCY!"
Of course I ran to the room, and I found Jaxon naked-
"Mom, I tried not to call for, but I have a problem! I got undressed and went urine, but then I had to go stinkers, so I did, but it didn't go all the way down like it does in the toilet, it's sticking up, and I have to do more urine, but I didn't want to get stinkers on my buns, so I got the wipes and tried to push it down, but my hand slipped and went in the urine...ALL OVER THE URINE, and I'm not sure if I have stinkers on my hand our not, and I tried to wipe it up but it's still wet, and I still have to go urine, and the stinkers are still standing up!!"
As you can imagine I had him hosed down in the tub in a flash, but I was trying so hard not to laugh!
#2. Yesterday we were walking out the door to church when I realized we hadn't done Jaxon's hair. I quickly plopped him on the counter and grabbed the spray bottle, comb, and spiker gel. (Let me insert here, that J is great when I do his hair, he never fights me...) so I started spraying his hair all over and after about 4 or 5 squirts he starts fighting me like crazy. I am still trying to spray his hair because I don't want to be late, so after about 4 more wild sprays he yells, "STOP! STOP! THAT STINKS! I'M NOT NAUGHTY!!!!"
uhhhh...woops....
I forgot that I dumped the water and filled the spray bottle with vinegar a week ago for back talk punishment. So, I had just wildly sprayed vinegar all over Jaxon! We didn't have time to get him undressed, wash his hair, and redressed, so had Dave run get his cologne, thinking I could mask the smell. I doused Jaxon's hair in cologne and spiker gel, then could still smell it, so some more cologne. It was the best I could do and we just left for church.
Once we got to church we noticed that somehow the combo of vinegar+cologne+water+spiker gel+more cologne made Jaxon's hair have a white powder ALL OVER IT. It seriously looked like the spray gray that you would put in your hair to make you look old. AND! To make matters worse, he still stunk to high heaven. If possible, the cologne only joined with and magnified the vinegar.
Luckily Jax was being a daddy's boy and spent most of Sacrament Meeting on Dave's lap, but it was hysterical to look over to see Jax trying to snuggle Dave, and Dave trying to do anything to keep his nose out of Jaxon's hair!
...you win a few, you lose a few!
9 comments:
Both of those were hilarious. I would have to agree with Jaxon that the whole stinker/urine situation was definitely an emergency! And it's funny, but my mom totally uses vinegar for cleaning and in her hair as a conditioner. She swears it gets rid of product build-up, but my dad hates the smell...still hasn't stopped her though.
Funny but gross times two.
You seriously have the best stories ever! Pure entertainment thankyou! And thank you also for your testimonies yesterday, touched my heart.
what i think is hilarious is that you use the correct term "urine" and then use "stinkers." makes me laugh.
haha that is good.
Poor Dave in church! And gross about the first one. Can't he leave his room to go to the bathroom? As long as he promises to leave you alone?
Your potty stories make me want nothing to do with potty training. That is hilarious!!
Those stories both cracked me up! It is so nice to sit down at the computer and laugh! Thanks for the fun read!
I loved those stories! How funny! I love to drop in and see how you're doing every now and then. You probalbly don't remember me (you visit taught me when I first moved to aZ 5 years ago)...Brandis was in our ward too! Your family is just beautiful! Glad you're doing great!
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